A Visit To Class Clown Hamburgers
I Ate Grown-Up Burgers In My Uncle's Rec Room.
Nostalgia is the greatest ingredient in any recipe. Just add a bit of it to a dish and it will mystically transform it into something beyond just components on a plate, or in this case, in your hands. There are many reasons I don’t like visiting newly hyped restaurants, one of them includes the effort it takes to get a seat. The other reason is that new restaurants are rarely good. They take at least a few months to get into a groove, build a culture, and become a cohesive unit. It’s Wednesday, it’s 11 AM, and it’s my day off. What better time than any to follow your recommendations and visit Calgary’s current burger obsession, Class Clown?
Class Clown is a restaurant fuelled by nostalgia. The space is reminiscent of a Filipino uncle’s rec room from 1978, though, it isn’t cluttered like many places that try to replicate a retro vibe by cramming in so much vintage kitsch that it forgets it’s a restaurant. This space has an upholstered bar, wood-panelled walls, and the shelves of era-appropriate knick-knacks. The only thing it doesn’t have that a Filipino uncle’s does is the case lots of Costco purchases that pile up over time like the warehouse at the end of Raiders Of The Lost Ark. I mean, who needs 8 cases of Ensure?
It’s fascinating to see that burger choices on menus these days have evolved from very utilitarian descriptions (single, double, cheese, bacon cheddar) to nostalgia-driven options, reflecting flavour profiles made famous by brands like McDonald's and In-N-Out. I think this is largely because in some cases, we would like to experience brands we don’t have here, like In-N-Out. In other cases, like in the Donald McRonald burger, we’re intrigued by the idea of trying the classic flavour of a McDonald’s Big Mac but with premium ingredients prepared with skill and the utmost care. Though I was expecting a premium burger bar to have a premium-priced menu, I was surprised to see that it was consistent with many other places in the city. I was more surprised and delighted to see that highballs were only $6. 11 AM be damned, I’m having a rum and coke.
On this visit, I opted for the California Classic, a homage to the famous In-And-Out burger featuring 2 mustard grilled smash patties, 2 slices of American cheese, “trillion” island sauce, pickles, shrettuce, tomato, grilled onion, on a toasted and buttered sesame seed bun. What arrives is a neatly wrapped package of the mentioned components, expertly crafted to defy the laws of burger physics and remain intact through every glorious bite. In the case that it does fall apart, the staff was thoughtful enough to include a moist towelette packet.
In addition, I ordered a bowl of Super Fries, crinkle-cut fries covered in a house cheese sauce, topped with crushed Hawkins Cheezies and chives. My doctor would be shaking her head right now, but come on…crinkle-cut fries. What I can say is that as a pairing to the burger, it is a little much, but perfect for sharing. The cheese sauce is wonderfully smooth and delicious, and the chopped fresh chives are a nice touch to bring a little grown-up class to this “cheap and fun” dish.
Overall, Class Clown does deliver on its promise to give diners a fun place to enjoy a good burger and a taste of nostalgia. It offers a nice alternative for people who want a bit of refinement and doesn’t take itself too seriously. In other words, you could have your Royale with Cheese and a glass of beer like your inner Vincent Vega. Class Clown is located in Mission at #106 - 1711 4 St. SW.
Note: Boozy shakes would be great, though. Imagine, a Shamrock shake utilizing creme de menthe with a really good ice cream. Wouldn’t that be epic? Creme de Menthe would redeem itself from its lowly place going from “the only booze you could steal from your parent’s liquor cabinet” to a bonafide drink component.
